Daily Mail Weekend Magazine Archers Update Mar 6-10

Neil must have hoped that he would spend his later years leaning on the gate of a pigsty, idly scratching a sow’s ear and thinking about the changes for next week’s bell-ringing practice. Susan, a woman with an insatiable hunger for status and soft furnishings, had other ideas. This week, as is her way, she feels called upon to give her unambitious husband some sound advice.
Oliver could do with a bit of sound advice over at Grey Gables when one employee makes a bad decision, while at Greenacres, Jazzer hatches a risky plan that could go horribly wrong.
Amy has her own decision-making crisis, tensions mount between Alice and Chris about Martha’s birthday, while Kate and Kirsty take very different routes as they bid for the same job.

Thanks to LadySusan of The Ambridge Reporter


‘Find a time machine and don’t shag me because then I will be reabsorbed into the Horrobin scum what spawned me, and Emmur and ugly defective baby Chrystiffur will never be, and Ambridge will be the better for it and you might even Have A Life. Oh, Neeyull, how often have I told you to take your boots off? Mind the carpet.’