Northumbrian Fishwife


used to be a standard phrase,I think?


I believe our Soobers knows some lovely ones. Not like Ruth. Does it not occur to her that they have given Josh no encouragement or guidance ever?


Josh was trying to sort out his life, wunne? I mean, that was the problem


I was just sorry she didn’t give the snivelling spineless gutless wretch a proper dressing down


Never mind, dere, I expect his ever-loving sister will pile in.


Yes, you have to remember he had a very disadvantaged upbringing.

He wasn’t Pip.


And Pip’s achievments are?

Having unprotected sex resulting in a child



Can anyone think of any others?


Not being strangled for her entire life. That’s got to count for something.


But as a Brokefailed Archer she is exempt from slow strangulation surely?


I can think of no reason why she should be…


Particularly galling considering all the alternatives it could have led to.



A nice fatal disease, for example.


Why a nice one?


A long painful slow disease would be my idea for Pip


As long as we didn’t actually have to listen to it.

Well, not all of it.


Just the highlights? Yeah, I’d be up for that, although they could do one of those ‘all day’ - sorry ‘across the day’ - broadcasts, and I’d be up for that too.


Highlights could be difficult

How do you whittle such a joyous listening experience down to just highlights?


…well, there’s always TheGroggTurnipMemorialShotGub! …eh?