Don’t we all adore fried food?
I did see someone on the telly frying food with a measly measured half a teaspoon of oil
That isn’t enough to coat the pan I think
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Crumbs from a Pastrycook’s Floor
Once you’ve taken 'em in, you won’t want any more
It can be hard when out of lard to make yer raised pie proper
And fill yer boots: some substitutes will see you come a cropper.
Cookeen provokes chagrin; we balk at Stork
Or any other Devil’s pus that’s sold as ‘margarine’.
I swear by God and Sweeney Todd
Too many pies are bloody ODD,
With pastry flaccid, unappealing,
Or hard as plaster off the ceiling.
For a pastry that is golden from the days we now dub ‘olden’
And also light as air (which is rare)
The fat you should boil is not coconut oil
But old-fashioned Ambre Solaire.
If you want a solution for larks’ tongues en croute -
The perfection you’re seeking is ‘utter’ -
The crust that you press in your mould or your flute
Should wholly be based upon butter.
For cases tiny and refined,
Dear cook, please bear these words in mind:
‘Suet is not how to do it
For minipies, raised round a cruet’.
And it’s hard to stick to metre when you’re fresh out of saltpetre
(And the fire in the range is on the fritz)
And overweight and over fifty… But me rolling pin’s still nifty:
And where do you think you are - the bloody Ritz?
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(falls about on the floor muffling helpless laughter in a large sparrersnuffer)
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More foods were fried when I was younger, but usually in dripping, or vegetable oil.
We/I have never owned a deep fat fryer. The nearest we got to that was a chip pan wivvan basket.
These days, I don’t fry much, but when I do, it’s usually in butter, or butter mixed with an suitable oil. I have rapeseed & sunflower oils in refillable spray bottles too.
If I am frying steaks, I would spray the meat, rather than
the pan
The lard is used for roasting pork, & encouraging dripping, or occasional (rare) pastry making.
Coconut oil is very good fer the teeth…
Carinthia.xx
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I thought it was just bad for the bacteria?
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Ooh, thanks, TFM! I’ll watch in the morn 
Love it, Gus!
Soo xx
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Gus dear I was nearly asleep then I read yon poem
I scared two cats off the bed with my guffaws
Thank you
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Setting up in business as Moggiebogle Laureate ;- )
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Bins to put out
Carinthia.xx
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Thanks for the reminder. Green bin is packed full, ‘cos today was an good chainsawin’ day.
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NDN put his hedge clippings in mine, but there is only usually peelings & scraps/bones innit
Have felt fairly ruff for a few days, so might not have been as thorough in my collecting as usual.
I know that we joke about it, but all this recycling requires sorting, storage, & a means of getting wot isn’t collected at the kerbside to wherever itizz supposed to be.
I may need an Medicinal
Or 3
Carinthia.xx
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At present we need to have in our house
The small kitchen-rubbish-composting bin
The large various-non-recyclables-rubbish bin
The paper-and-cardboard bin
The bottles tins and plastics bin
and now the thin-plastics bin.
We are running out of space in the kitchen and hall for all the bins we need to put there.
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Yes, it can’t all be compressed/compacted either.
I have a couple of bags on the back of the bathroom door for ‘upstairs’ plastics & paper.
The water for house plants is kept in the kitchen in a 30 year old fabric conditioner bottle!
Carinthia.xx
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Lots of rain overnight, and more to come, so probably no chainsawin’ today. Hey ho. I have murderised some bramble stems anyway.
yardarm
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Tsk. Murderated, surely? (How?)
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Note that I do not claim to have killed the whole bramble…
Pulled 'em up wiv me bare* claws.
* tool use is part of me evolutionary wotsit so a Leatherman may have been involved
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Morning, all.
Our daily walk involves ever-increasing bramble hazards, so Mr Bee has taken to judicious deployment of secateurs. Very public spirited, but the greatest concern for me is the proliferation of nettles that threatens me every time I need to jump into the undergrowth to avoid bikes or horses. Anyhoo - no walkies, today. I’m giving my hip a rest and will shop, instead. Groan. Mask-wearing is going out of fashion, up here…
Soo xx
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Morning all
beef going in for pie filling soon
Just the weather for raised pies served hot from the oven here I think
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Sounds delicious, Twellsy. Did you decide upon the fat for the pastry?
It’s damp and coolish, here, and a Great Improvement.
Soo xx
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I am going decadent and using half/half water and our neighbour’s unpasteurised milk with butter
As I read more it is the ratio of fat and strong flour that matters
So rich decadent and delicious is my plan though I tend to use butter or lard instead of marg or oil anyway
Though in my wee cafe it was catering marg to be cost effective
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