It was vile
A Former Poster on Peets & here stopped listening, as she had suffered terrible abuse from her first husband & had no help/support around the corner. As soon as he started hitting her in front of their child, she made plans, and, eventually got away.
I have been Pondering the OP all day-I listened this morning rather than last night.
We all know how complicated RL is/can be . My Stepchildren’s mother did die, when they were almost 12,&14, & they both reacted differently:
Stepdaughter had ‘unfinished business’ in that her mother had made promises that she was unable to keep,& The Lad needed to know where his Dad was until the day Mr C died.
Learning what becomes the ‘Noo Normality’ is a precarious process, & we aren’t always at our best, but the Responsible Adult is just that, & has to do their best, however Shite/Angry they feel .
I think that trying to maintain everything ‘as it was’ puts unreasonable pressure on everyone. Things are never the same again . They can become very good indeed, but different , & it all takes a long time