A BBC spokesperson said: "In line with the latest guidelines from the WHO and Public Health England, we are reducing our broadcasts of The Archers to five per week, in order to help people to maintain a positive mental attitude during these trying times.
“Until the end of April, the show will also replace any speech by Helen or Pip with the sound of chainsaws cutting down thousand-year-old trees, which our test audiences said was ‘much more pleasant’.”
Tsk. You are a Bad Sparrow.
Have a loaf of new-baked bread and a pork pie?
In other news, production of EastEnders and Coronation Street will not be affected, since most of the parts are already played by autoclave-safe robots.
For some reason I read that as “prats”
Unsurprisingly, these changes are not reflected on the BBC’s Archers page. (Which of course contains spoilers.)
The actual press release which inspired this is here - see penultimate para.