Emotional totalitarianism

Blasted Helen, in case you hadn’t guessed.
Now as regular readers know, I am not a partisan for the Ulster chef - rather the reverse - but to go and harass him in his own home because he had not seemed sufficiently enamoured of her personality-deficient, pyjama-wrapped, ****-struck permanent adolescent squeeze seems A Bit Bloody Much to me. If Helen lerves anyone, all must love him. Worked well with Rob, didn’t it, quine?

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I want to know where the real Helen is

Talking sense to Krusty and then to Ian next episode is too far fetched
The mankwold fumes are getting to her

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Much as I admire Helen’s character arc, I think it’s being a bit drawn out. Can we just fast-forward to the bit where she’s writing orders to tank divisions that were wiped out six months ago?

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That made me laugh quite a lot, Sparrer: ta.

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Is mankwold a cheese she produces? I missed that one and don’t understand Hedgesparrow’s joke …explain somebody please!!!

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Mankwold is a name for Borsetshire Blue, Helen’s occasionally, when it isn’t being disappointing and losing customers, prize-winning cheese, which originated on another board. Possibly even the old BBC boards. It has Spooneristic properties. cf the late and unlamented muck, Lymeswold

As for Hedger’s joke, well, either a whole slew of cultural reference seems to have passed you by or you just need to think about it a bit more in a wider, non-Ambridge context. It might help if you were to visualise Helen with some facial hair.

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I suspect it’s the covert reference is avoidance of Godwin, Joanna.

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Also it does seem to be a traditional failure mode of dictators; Napoleon did something similar towards the end.

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Gosh I remember Lymeswold - it was horrid - whatever was wrong with Danish Blue - that’s all we had when I was growing up - Stilton for special occasions. I think I now might get the joke - but Gus is right - I need to look beyond Ambridge …whither though? I know you are all listening but I do podcast later tonight- Peaky Blinders Series 4 episode 2 now…

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That had never occurred to me until now!

(Well of course, it wouldn’t have, wot with me being so innocent and everything.)

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You don’t eat cheese with a spoon, yer silly Billy.

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Spoon? You wouldn’t eat Mankwold for a bet.

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Depends on the size of the wager

Everyone has a price

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Train up on hydrofluoric acid first?

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I think that would do wee birdie

But I like blue cheese and so I would be tempted by a mere trillion quid to try the stuff and save you all from the horror

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Not much use if you’re not around to spend it.

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After many years as a peeler I have an iron constitution

Nowt upsets my innards!

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