Masterchef (of limited interest, probably)

Right. Fook off, Pukie. Blue rice, and terrified of touching a half-grown calf, and putting a horrible grey Thai-with-Irish-herbs curry sauce with what was obviously magnificent lamb. And her pissy little plate pictures. Enough already.

I was wrong

about Ioan.

Sarah - no, she won’t win but she’s my favourite - put bloody years on me with those tart cases. Why didn’t she make spares? (Maybe they aren’t allowed to, just for the drama.) But I would have hoovered that up: roast artichoke purée, smoked Gubbeen sabayon and the lovely raisin pureé and other bitlets… Was very pleased that the dining room seemed to agree. I’d take ‘celestial’ as a review any day.

OK, Mystic Gus’s crystal ball is not wholly reliable, whereas my ability to jinx contestants seems to be rather more so, but Eddie to win?

Radha has finally ditched the Ickle Gurly stuff, thank goodness, and what she turned out was really impressive. But I still want to slap her. After I’ve dealt with Pookie.

‘Had I but time enough, and haddocks,
I’d fish-slap all the nascent Cradocks’

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I too was wrong about Ioan

Pookie & the Effing blue food again

Sigh

Carinthia.xx

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I suppose that cooking good plain food and not making a fuss about it isn’t suitably telegenic.

I mean, the closest they would come is something like “in three hours, five thousand hungry squaddies are going to start walking through that door, and your only kitchen help is the five of them who annoyed their sergeants most yesterday”. Which might be fun.

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I think that that counts as catering, which is a different kettle of poissons altogether!

The programme can be excellent, & shows real skill in many, but always produces difficult people/situations.
The vegetarian cook had to get the others to taste her dishes for her, which they happily did, but it is a competition, & the prize can be life-changing. I don’t think that she will win.

Carinthia.xx

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In many previous series they did have mass catering challenges, but the format has changed a lot, I assume Because Covid. Those rounds were reliable idiot/bastard indicators. Not quite on the scale of 5,000 hungry squaddies, but still high-volume stuff.

More lurid feckin’ rice. What’s wrong with the bloody woman? The only person I’ve ever seen to make a cheongsam look like a housecoat;- )

‘Play to my strengths’ says Radha re the patisserie, when at the outset she’d never made a dessert before, seeing as how she’s only TWO! the youngest contestant, though they hardly ever mention that;- ) Proper little liar, and when she lets the wide-eyed face slip, well… Sly wee besom. First for my haddock treatment come the revolution, despite strong competition from Pookie.
Go Eddie! And then go to the gym: he’s inflated rather during the series.

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I shouted at the telly at the green rice…

Slightly off topic, but they are making tracksuit jackets in Sewing Bee

Bluddy vile colours too still, at least I don’t have to eat them…

Carinthia.xx

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…not being a moth.

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Gus I have a contact for halibuts

You might need one of them

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When Gregggg said he ‘would dip anything in that sauce’ I came over all queasy.
Found purple rice, on a pudding, not really a problem. But ffs, so much gold leaf: why don’t you use foil like the rest of us, luv?

Brilliant comment from mumsnet:
‘I really lack confidence in my cookery skills but I applied to Masterchef,’ is the culinary equivalent of ‘I was too ashamed to go to my GP about this boil on my clitoris so I went on Embarassing Bodies instead.’

Think they made the right decision on tonight’s dishes.
Might comment further later.

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I agree

And about the gold leaf too…

Carinthia.xx

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