One-liners to December 31

30 Nov Tony makes an emotional discovery and David finds himself backed into a corner.
01 Dec Gavin has the rug pulled from under him and Tracy has a bone to pick with another resident.
02 Dec Jazzer finds himself under attack and it’s the end of an era for Susan.
03 Dec Eddie learns a valuable lesson and Chris struggles with recent events.

07 Dec Chris finds himself on edge and Eddie makes a new discovery.
08 Dec Chris’s paranoia threatens to overwhelm him, and Kirsty struggles with the prospect of moving.
09 Dec Alice’s behaviour causes suspicion while Lily and Freddie’s birthday celebrations have an unexpected outcome.
10 Dec Helen is asked a shocking favour and will Gavin finally do the right thing?

14 Dec Susan makes her farewell and Oliver gets stuck in.
15 Dec Philip’s making plans and Kirsty’s looking forward to Christmas.
16 Dec Roman drops a bombshell and Eddie concocts a plan.
17 Dec Philip sets his plan in motion and Gavin’s on the brink.

21 Dec Tracy struggles to pick up the pieces and Freddie finds himself with more on his plate than he anticipated.
22 Dec David’s evening takes a surprising turn and Eddie is very much in demand.
23 Dec Gavin reaches the end of his tether and Jazzer calls a truce.
24 Dec Kirsty demands answers and there’s a festive surprise for Clarrie.

28 Dec Kirsty makes a big decision and Tracy attempts to cover her true feelings.
29 Dec Freddie attempts damage limitation and Phoebe tries to cheer up a loved one.
30 Dec Peggy has a shocking suggestion and Jazzer finds himself in a compromising position.
31 Dec Ambridge faces a life-changing crisis and one resident makes a special announcement.


“That’s the first toime Oi’ve been goosed by one of they turkeys.”

PS: sod off. luv, Gus.


“This isn’t going to be like my other relationships. This time I’m going to dump him!

“But surely the underlying metaphor is dualistic in that… oh right, cor wallop wahey knockers.”

“We’ll build a 300 foot wall round… well, Elizabeth mostly. Maybe a few more people.”

“Don’t be so sad, Me.” (Well, whom else does Phoebe love?)

"We’ll form a village electricity co-operative!

“And nobody ever needs to know, ‘duckie’, if you just do us this small favour…”

“What’s that 300 foot wall doing round the village?”

“And I’ve blocked the drains and turned all the taps on.”


This week looks like it could be entertaining

And who will have the best Christmas evva?


Nobody leaves Ambridge. Even when you’re dead they don’t let you go.


Hotel California or Grey Gables?