One-liners to May 5

10 Apr Ruth puts her foot down while Ben fishes for information.
11 Apr David receives a surprising offer and Tracy is intrigued.
12 Apr Jill gets in the driving seat and Ben expresses his emotions.
13 Apr Elizabeth is not impressed and Jazzer offers a shoulder.
14 Apr Ruairi makes a shocking confession and there are celebrations at Brookfield.

17 Apr The identity of the mysterious Easter bunny is revealed and Ian faces a kitchen crisis.
18 Apr Ruairi finds himself in too deep and Roy has a bone to pick.
19 Apr It’s an emotional day for Oliver and Tracy fears for the future.
20 Apr Alice tries to get to the bottom of recent events and Freddie hatches a plan.
21 Apr Lynda comes to the rescue in more ways than one and there’s an awkward encounter for Jolene.

24 Apr Ian makes plans for the future and there’s an emergency on the cricket pitch.
25 Apr Brian faces an uphill struggle and opportunity knocks for Tracy.
26 Apr Tracy tries to make a good impression and debate rages about the future of Home Farm.
27 Apr There’s a difficult question for Susan, and Clarrie is feeling left out.
28 Apr Jazzer makes a big gesture and Adam puts his plan into action.

01 May Oliver makes a tempting offer and Pat struggles to offer advice.
02 May Roy doesn’t know where to turn and there’s a shock for Pat.
03 May Tracy makes her feelings clear and Stella faces an unexpected hurdle.
04 May Pat contemplates the future and Eddie attempts to help a friend in need.
05 May There’s a sad goodbye in Ambridge and Jolene offers an olive branch.

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Really? Sad? Getting shot of any one of them would be an improvement.
But probably someone is jettisoning an old pair of boots or similar. I shall not raise me hopes.

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“The Home Farm Brat is even worse than the locally grown variety. Break out the spoiled milk!”

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It’ll be Oliver, won’t it? Having sold Grey Gables.

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You could be right, me dear.
However, if it is indeed a ‘goodbye’, that would suggest he is also leaving the rural hellhole, which in turn would leave the Grundys infesting his house. That would annoy me a very great deal.
Maybe it’s just hoteliering he is saying goodbye to.

And with luck the new owners will wish to say goodbye to Tracy. I choose to interpret slimy Shah’s comment that she could do better elsewhere as a hint to start looking…

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Where?

The greasy spoon by the Phelpersham bypass?

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Ideally, Wick. Or Thurso. Or Holyhead.

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Well, she’d presumably have to leave Ambridge to find any man who didn’t go instantly gooey at the prospect of Baybeees.

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Unfortunately she has already burdened the earth with issue.

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Are Tracy’s offsprogs the result of a stable relationship?

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Oh, sure, but surely even women not entirely opposed to the prospect of breeding might not care for this strange uniformity.

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She’s not Catherine the Great, dere;- )

Tedious beyond belief, they are…

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No, and their sire was not an Ambridge man. That he left her probably indicates he wasn’t gooey about his offspring: he doesn’t seem ever to have seen them since Tracy went to stay with her sister, and there has never been any mention of maintenance for them either.

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Well…

of his house?

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