What can I do? (Pip)

The Archers
1

I’m sure inventive yet suitable suggestions will be forthcoming.

  1. Insist that Home and Bridge Farms are told immediately of the ‘truth’
  2. Stop focusing on how you feel and start thinking about what it would be appropriate to do
  3. Do it. Rafters and rope are readily available.
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2

Admitting that Toby doesn’t actually have anything to say that is helpful, and that she actually doesn’t like him very much, might be a good thing too. Getting him out of her life can only improve matters.

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3

3a) End your life usefully: become an obstacle in Helen’s path, and see how long you last, which will give us proof of her murderous tendencies. (In the film version you’ll be rescued at the last moment. Honest.)

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4

No, no, no! Toby stays. He is a useful idiot, and anyway, he is growing on me. He provides so much potential for additional miscalculations on the part of Champion the WonderPip. And is another ‘prop’ (admittedly currently a very minor league sort of one) to be pulled from under Her (former) Wondrousness.

ps, I am running a book with myself about responses to this post

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5

Do you have an entry for “no comment”?

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6

You can pull props away, sure, but setting fire to them (as in the traditional way of undermining a castle) is much more fun.

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7

The only possible response to that is

no

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8

This would be the way to go, wouldn’t it?
I was listening to a World Service article about advice that younguns had received from their Grandparents. A young chap told us that his Granny had advised against running away from problems, rather moving towards them, to find solutions. Would that Pip had such a good family support system.

Soo xx

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9

But she has a remarkably lively grandparent… oh, I see what you mean.

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10

Yes - what I mean is that the entire family are dunderheids. Grrrrrrrrrr.
Soo xx

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11

Now there’s a splendid word.
Well yes, ‘grrrr’ is good*, but ‘dunderheid’ was the one I was shooting for.
Gxxx

*you should see me in me brrrces

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12

Why do they never have local government elections in Ambridge and, can I have £5 at 10:1 on whoever wins?

How’s that for a response to your post?

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13

‘Precious little use’ since you ask, dere. althought I do seem to be losing my bet with myself anyway.

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14

I imagine that you favoured the rafters, Gus. Brr ces - I am struggling :wink:
Soo xx

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15

Pip … should just leave
Daisy Badger … should go for a shower and never return, but be replaced by an actress.

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16

"ggr is good’ = ‘greed is good’, as per Gordon Gecko. Hence ‘brrces’, which he conspicuously wore.
Plain as daylight, no? Ah: not. Sorry.

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17

That whizzed over my fuzzy head, Dere Gus. I hope that you are not alarmed by this :relaxed:
Soo xx

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18

Pip, here are your orders: march over to Brookfield and tell your mother than nine days is plenty for even for a massive sulker like her and the time has come for everyone to stop wringing their hands and bloody well do something. You are sooo sorry for your part in this mess, you feeyoo terriboo and you are going to right now to Home Farm and Bridge Farm - just as Gus suggested - and you are going to tell them that you let the cattoo out.

Then you are going back to Brookfield and you are going to sit down with your parents with pencil and paper and work out how much this is all going to cost and how you are going to pay for your part in it. But do not let your parents forget their little contribution to this mess, the IBR, particularly the one who calls herself the herd manager.

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19

Traumatised. Pls snd hlp nd gn. R md, y bng _ b nd ll. gxxx

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20

Sláinte mhaith, Gus.
Soo xx

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