Wuss's New Job

Running “My Little Art Gallery”

Coming soon: “Impressions of Ambridge” (a collection of water-colours by Ambridge’s very own Leonard (da Wincing (named for the expression most viewers wear when viewing his feeble efforts))

Horse enthusiasts are recommended to see the George Stubbs paintings currently at The V & A, The Hunterian Museum and Art Gallery, Glasgow, The British Sporting Art Trust,
…cont. on p. 94


But how can he possibly work in the art gallery? I mean produce his Art, not be gainfully employed. If being on his tod in Lower Loxley eight hours a day is too distracting for him to be able to paint deathless masterpieces, how can having to face the public be any better?


…another entry for the “As If” list? (does that still exist?)


…perhaps the gallery is only ever visited by the silents?


His career seems to have been primarily in education, given that he was deputy head of a sixth form college. I believe Shaw had something to say on the subject.


Forgive my ignorance but has the gallery ever been an item before, insomuch as it’s been described or explained ?

Is it 20 extremely average paintings and a couple of statues from TK Maxx in an otherwise unused room, or several thousand, shown on rotation, containing masterpieces of international renown ?

That it could be someone’s job … and enough to cause stress … is mind boggling.


The job is to make the former look like the latter.

Fortunately Borsetshire tourists are on a par with the other inhabitants we’ve met.


The first mention of the gallery in Lowfield is on 7th March 1999:
“Lizzie’s feeling a little dispirited over the building work at Lower Loxley, it’s noisy and ugly but it’s also starting to cost them bookings. She’s thinking about hosting her fortccoming art exhibition in a barn rather than the main building - and she’s even considering making it into a permanent gallery, maybe with a café!”

(The building work was the complete reconstruction of the roof because of deathwatch beetle.)

A barn was chosen, Sean Myerson discouraged from designing the “space” there for Julia (his ideas were too expensive and Julia was trying to take over Elizabeth’s project) and Lewis Carmichael employed to design it. I don’t think he was involved in the repair-work which had happened in early 1999.

The gallery hosts exhibitions of all sorts of art, and has done ever since it was opened.

And while looking for that I happened upon “At Lower Loxley, Nigel and Elizabeth are agonising over the idea of an accommodation block. It would change the character of their business, making much more work for them with a 24-hour commitment. It has no common ground with the gallery and would necessitate selling all eleven cottages and one of the farms.”

ELEVEN cottages? ONE of the FARMS? What are their financial problems exactly?


“Oh look! Here’s a new one! What is its name? ‘TA listener about to puke after listening to what can only be an episode from the Trypewryter of TheStimpleton’”


Also, she said it comes with “bed and board”, so does it have an apartment which he will move into, or has the previous gallery manager been living quietly in a corner of Lower Loxley up until now?


Here’s the board. Your first job is to turn it into a bed.


He can now sleep “under canvas”, Shirley !