Ah, I do miss me lovely Ēastseaxe girls.
Pthink Ptraci in Ptyramids: half temple dancer, half bandsaw. My lot favoured the bandsaw side, on the whole.
I did enjoy a query I fielded re our Ethics Committee…
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Yea, though thou walkest through the valley of the shadow of death, thou wilt fear no evil: for thine eye be fixèd solely upon thy bloody phone and thou wouldst not notice even if an herd of elephants run into thee.
And the Lord sent many Signs, that the people should know the True Path and be Safe in the Eyes of the Lord as they went about their business. But some there were who looked not to the Signs and cared naught for their fellow man as he walked upon the set path, saying, “Lord, these Signs speak not to us nor do we care for the True Path and the Ways that Thou has set forth, for we are Cyclists and shall go wheresoever it bloody well pleaseth us.”
And then the Lord sent forth His Vengeance, and that Vengeance roared mightily and belched forth smoke as it swept all before it in its Dreadful Chariot. Let him that hath sense fear and shun the number of the beast: for it is an inhuman number; and the number is 16 or as they who would be its false prophets count it, 4 x 4
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Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established. And also look upon the way thou art bleedin’ well going, Son: for the Lord thy God hath set it plain before thee, and He and thy mother might care but none other shall ease their bowels about it.
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Remember thine message board hosts that thine erudite deliberations may not be deleted in a fit of pique
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Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee: but for pity’s sake also wash thine hands in the Brook of Eshcol and lick not of the latches of thine neighbour’s door. For he is an mucky bugger and unpleasing to the watchers of the Lord, who tracketh as they traceth, through ways no man can fathom.
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What profiteth it a Sparrer if he gain an half-brick and an lead pipe and every kind of kit even unto an little slitty knife, if he loseth his own Shopping List?
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When incarcerated in the plague pit it payeth greatly in the way your personal care is enhanced if you are polite and grateful with a smile and a flirtatious comment to handsome young male gnursies
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Even the blackest cloud has an edge -
but since the buggers can float about, you’ll get wet anyway
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A Bird in the hand probably has high explosives concealed in the shrubbery.
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Was the use of the word’shrubbery’ a happy accident, or did you consider saying ‘explosives concealed in the bush’ and then reject it as bad taste?
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When, in your brief but fairly unconstrained acquaintance with me, have you noticed me deferring to notions of good taste, eh?
However, knowin’ the Bird I had in mind, a full shrubbery would be needed. Never knowingly 'under-catered ', one might say.
PS: a not-proven tseep is traditional at this juncture, Dunnock. Also, that Fatsia will never be the same again. Or different again. It would appear to have been vaporized.
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Must’ve caught fire in all the hot wevver we’ve bin havin’ lately.
(contemplates soggy fevvers)
Look over there, it’s Elvis!
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Not all shiny squirrels are called Elvis, you know. Speciesist and reflectionist. Tsk.
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love thy fellow posters that there be no modding needed of your posts
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[deleted by moderator]
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Moderation is a fatal thing. Nothing succeeds like bad taste.
(sorry, Oscar)
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When baking mince pies it is best to put the larger discs of pastry on the bottom!
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Buggrit
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Ach I caught it after the first pie so only one mucked up out of 17
Apparently they are lovely and my butcher was delighted to be given a present all for his own self
He was like a wee boy…
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It is better to light a single magnesium flare than to curse the darkness.
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