So, who wants to help ... to cower in the cellar?


It’s got my vote!


Waddles in under a humungous porkie pie that might keep a wee birdie happy

Anyone help me get it on the table please?


Looks good to me…


It’ll be easier to lift if I just nibble off a little bit down here…




Feck it. 'scloshnuff…

Cake? Coffee & Walnut made with normous negg…


That Bird isn’t going to be able to fly at all, at this rate!


's’all right, anyfing wot has a go at me will just bounce off…


Ooooh, happy birfday Dunnock.

Well done to surving yet another year.



The sky is traditional English grey, and it’s time forra post-birthday



Bacon butty

Or hot buttered crusts?


Bacon in hot buttered crusts?

(I’ll just hide over here out of Chatelainely elbow-reach.)


Mrs. Armrest.

Sadly un-surpringly.

Time keeping.





If I hadn’t got 2 men here fitting the Noo Boiler I would have been there wiv me Sharpened Elbows Toot Sweet…

Yerran Lucky Dunnock today…



I will do you a loaf all of yer own dear chatelaine

I appear to have a chesticle infection

And I got a new toy in the post today

A white stick

I may have a swim in the gin lake as this is not a thing to celebrate…


Oh, but Twellsy, you can shove it into the spokes (or other parts) of pavement cyclists, and then say “oh sorry I didn’t see you there”…


Tee hee dear wee birdie

I like that idea



Well, it’s a bit early, but some reprobate has called the Yardarm, so why not?


Tsk, Sparrer. That is an exceedingly dangerous thing to do. Brains and bludd make paving terribly slippery: someone could do themselves a ninjury.


Proper Job?


Gus dere

It tends to be children on the pavements on bikes or scooters

I hope I am allowed to insert my stick into their spokes?

Please let me damage childer with a superb alibi?