Sturmey Archer’s Slipped Cogs


#201

I think that was about the time at which I started to say “Mawk! Mawk! Mawk!” with increasing volume.


#202

Did you then lay an egg, dere?


#203

Actrix: sporting feats whereby a bowler dismisses three batsmen with successive deliveries

“What care I if sciatica comes,
If elephantiasis calls?
I bowled three cricketing Thesps
With three consecutive balls”

And now I am going to have to chase down the origin of that, drat you :wink:


#204

…the only thing your mention of cricket brings to this wretched mind is:

"The boy stood on the burning deck
Playing a game of cricket
The ball ran up his trouser-leg
and stumped his middle-wicket!" :grimacing::grimacing::grimacing: :roll_eyes:

(…wiv’ apologies to Mrs. Felicia Dorothea Hemans)


#205

Had she designs on the boy?


#206

And I have. It is from Cricket Songs by Norman Gale, 1896.

The Church Cricketant
I bowled three sanctified souls
With three consecutive balls!
What do I care if Blondin trod
Over Niagra Falls?
What do I care for the loon in the Pit
Or the gilded Earl in the Stalls?
I bowled three curates once
With three consecutive balls!

I caused three protestant ‘ducks’
With three consecutive balls!
Poets may rave of lily girls
Dancing in marble halls!
What do I care for a bevy of yachts
Or a dozen or so of yawls?
I bowled three curates once
With three consecutive balls!

I bowled three cricketing priests
With three consecutive balls!
What if a critic pounds a book
What if an author squalls?
What do I care if sciatica comes
Elephantiasis calls?
I bowled three curates once
With three consecutive balls.


#207

Well found! and worthy, too.


#208

Monday December the twenty-turd!
…well, here we go again, more turds, piled ever so much higher and ever so much deeper!
Six words:
Holy Jesus Christ on a Cornflake!
…well, what else is there to say?
Ho Ho Ho?
(…nope, somehow I think not! :nauseated_face::nauseated_face::nauseated_face::nauseated_face::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting::face_vomiting:)


#209

Yuletide! December twenty-fifthish! Ho Ho Ho!

…this is almost as bad as looking at the family snaps!

Bloody Charades? (…now who do we know (hint: famous (deceased) Royal Personage) who loved to play Charades?)

…living proofage that t’Archers 'ave ideas above their station!

Bestest line in Yule Epi:
BaconBoy: “…yes! yes! …alright, I’m an idiot!” (equal first)
unidentified cast-member: “…you can say that again!” (equal first)

(later) PolPat: (about BaconBoy) “…I could swing for him!”

RestOfWorld: “…oooohh, YES PLEASE!!!!”

Ho! Ho! Ho!
(…yeah, right! :roll_eyes: )


#210

So, Ollie Foxybrush has finally lost it!

(aside:) Hush! …what’s that noise?

RestOfWorld: “…just Caroline spinning in her grave!”


#211

I bet she is, but “It’s what Joe would have wanted”!


#212

The best Christmas Clarrieluv ever had

No slaving to pander to the Grundy menfolk


#213

I just had some truffle-infused salami … via Lidl.

I may never eat anything else. Ever.


#214

Fear not, Armrest. I survived, and so dv will you.

Cold gammon and bubble & squeak tonight. < purrrs >


#215

Oooh, bubble and squeak… Yes! And we have some cooked gammon in the freezer.


#216

…but surely (Shirley) you need spinach with that!

…well, “Heigh ho! says Rowley”

(…for more see: (http://www.wordsforlife.org.uk/frog-he-would-wooing-go))
(…PS: good luck wiv yer courtin’ :thinking: )


#217

St Steven’s Day: Scrape, scrape scrape!

Angus? (…who he?¹)

¹ latest parachuted-in pretentious prat (…sounds like the perfect match for Kenny)

Sounds like a case for PCWoodenCop “'Ullo, 'ullo, 'ullo, Oooo whacked Eccles then?”

Oh well, (…looking at watch) better get out and hunt some wrens! (…it’s 22:02 on this side of t’Pond)


#218

He did rather deserve being called ‘Kenny’, don’t you think, after all the ‘Daves’ he has inflicted on his brother (or ‘bro’).


#219

…most definitely! (…I’ve even heard “KennyBoy” in these circles! :grin: )


#220

Friday December 27th: Scrap, scrape, scrape, wipe! …flush!

Zummer Weddin’ ? …sounds like a chance for BrokeFailed "Weddin’s R Us"
(…yeuch!!!)

…and so it goes!

…I can’t help but wonder: …does the twenty-grand include air-fare? …one-way for some guests (we hope)